Vow Writing Tips

Vows! Sitting down to write your vows can certainly be intimidating.
How do you begin to put into words everything you’re going to share with your wedding guests?

 

Do's and Dont's

DO say “I love you!” You wouldn’t believe how often this gets left out.

DON’T get long-winded. 2-3 minutes is plenty of time.

DON’T say “I promise…” on every line. Switch it up to “I vow to…” and “I will…” and it’ll flow better!

DO seek inspiration! Is there a song lyric, movie quote, book or poem excerpt that speaks to you two as a couple, your love, or your relationship? It’s a great opening line. One I’ve heard on a few occasions from brides is by Emily Bronte, “Whatever souls are made of, his and mine are the same.”

DON’T procrastinate! The vows you’re making are the entire reason you’re having a wedding, right?! Don’t wait to get started!

DO practice reading your vows in front of a mirror and to a friend or two! Reading it out loud will sound differently!

DON’T promise perfection. We, as humans, aren’t perfect. Marriage is hard and we all make mistakes. Promise to apologize, learn, and grow together!

 

DON’T joke. This isn’t the time or place. A little humor can work well and show your personality, but this is a very serious thing you’re doing and it just doesn’t come across well if you’re just trying to get some laughs. Along the same lines, I wouldn’t say anything that might be an inside joke between the two of you. This is just not the time for it.

The minister that married my husband and I gave us great advice and I’ve shared it to many of my couples over the years. Decide on 4-5 things you want to promise to one another. Perhaps it’s “to love”, “to stick around when things get tough”, “to trust”, etc. Take each of those things and put them in your own words. How are you going to promise that you’ll continue to love them, even when you don’t like them? (Yes, I just made a Grey’s Anatomy reference!)

After doing the tip mentioned above, throw in a few lines before and after and you’ve written your vows! Some things you could include are:

  • What was your first impression of them when you met?
  • When did you know they were your “forever”?
  • What are you looking forward to most in the future with them?
  • What do you remember most from when you got engaged?

How I Can Help

If you choose to write your own vows, I am happy to review them for you. I recommend this for a couple of reasons:

  • To make sure they’re similar length.
  • To make sure you’ve actually made promises! You wouldn’t believe how often I’m given “vows” and they say these are beautiful statements you want to hear and share on your wedding day – but without making promises, they’re simply not vows!

I am happy to print your vows on nice cardstock paper. It will photograph nicely and it’s blown up to 18 point font for easy reading. I will hold the vows for you so nobody is bringing it up on their phone, pulling it out of their dress or using crinkled up vows that were held up against a bouquet. We’re going to look classy, right?!

Pro tip: These printed vows make a lovely background to a wedding day shadow box! This is, of course, not required. You’re welcome to use vow books as well! I’m happy to hold them for you and hand them to you at the appropriate time.